Leader as coach

We were discussing the essence of coaching at the Primal Intelligence partners’ F2F meeting, and each of us had our own spin, but we arrived at the same place: great leaders are coaches. Here is one point made by each partner.

Leaders harness the power of vulnerability

Steve offered up the insight that great leaders see beyond what is presented to them in the moment in order to uncover a deeper level of insight. This is because they are wise enough to know that what is seen immediately is not necessarily the ultimate solution; however, it will be a stepping stone to that solution.

A good coach harnesses the power of powerful questions to draw out deeper information in order to spark fresh insights. When this mindset is brought to work, it applies equally to individuals and groups to go beyond the appearance and get to the heart of the challenge at hand.

Steve learned this by following his curiosity to explore the tension created by being told “no” by a group from whom judged he had full support. His initial experience was one of victimhood, rage, fear, shock and abandonment. He followed the advice of his mentor to go beyond his stories and entertained the notion that the judgements of others could be true. When did, he saw that what he thought was power over him was a lack of self-esteem and personal power. From this journey into himself, Steve learned that what he thought was power was, in fact, force. “Force is pushing against something; vulnerability is learning to flow with it”.

Harnessing the power of vulnerability is an essential tool for leaders to understand power, and the coach's capacity to ask the right questions is precisely what leads people to freedom that lives several steps beyond their initial reaction to their circumstances.

Inside-Out coaching approach = Leadership

Amar’s take on the relationship between coaching and leadership was that a great leader has to apply an inside-out methodology to their leadership.

Amar presented the axiom:

“Leadership is the ability to hold power accountable to truth.”

The juice here comes about because it's easier to hold people accountable who sit lower down in the pecking order than someone higher up. Amar believes a good leader doesn’t hesitate to ask tough questions.

This insight came about from his experience coaching a CEO of a Sydney-based company who, despite his powerful role, felt cornered by the demands of shareholders and the founder for extraordinary growth (50% per annum!). Both the founder and shareholders were “above” the CEO in rank. For this CEO to have the necessary conversation, the first penny-drop moment was that his “truth” is that a 50% rate of growth was unsustainable for staff and the environment. The challenge was to push back on those who were higher up the power hierarchy by having a clean conversation rather than saying nothing, building resentment and quitting in 12 months when he was burnt out.

The essence of the inside-out methodology is that having conversations from a place presence, attunement and resonance (PAR) is the foundation of co-creating win-win-win (i.e. people, profit, planet) outcomes. The CEO realised that the key to having this conversation was to connect with his deep conviction and allow truth to speak “through” him rather than avoid the conversation entirely because it was too hard. To foster and maintain attunement and resonance with others while maintaining a presence to his own conviction was how this CEO exemplified how an inside-out approach to communication enlivens difficult conversations and refines his own leadership.

Our next cohort of Inside Out coaching training begins on the 22nd June, 2023.

The royal road to increased capacity

Manny expressed the idea that all leaders, to some extent, understand their role contextually and embrace challenges. However, great leaders go deep within to understand themselves. A coaching mindset allows great leaders to handle their internal resistance to situations. The leader-coach also engages curiosity to understand what sits below internal resistance, both for themselves and those whom they lead and then develops the right mindset to address it.

This is the essence of the inside-out methodology that informs our unique coaching course and, as Manny knows, needs to be applied by leaders. By going inside first, you can resurface empowered, insightful and connected (to yourself) in a way that enhances your capacity to meet who and what is outside of you.

This approach exemplifies the notion that “leadership is about approach and choice rather than position”. The royal road to that place is walked by deploying a coach’s skilled capacity to explore your relationship between resistance and challenge and choose the leader's capacity to become anti-fragile.

Great leaders respond rather than react

Uri identified that, in his experience, great leaders are constantly striving to respond rather than react. He identified two powerful questions that leaders ask themselves to support them in doing just that.

The first question: “Am I in my centre?”

This is the kind of question that masterful coaches ask of themselves during their work with clients because they know that if they are off-centre, then then they have a high probability of unconsciously steering (or worse, highjacking) their client’s exploration from their own biases and triggers. Similarly, off-centre leaders will hijack the dynamic with those they should be empowering. Doubly problematic is the fact that if the leader’s role is formal, then when the leader loses their centre, it places an even heavier burden on the rest of the team because whilst coaches follow their clients, leaders often have to guide their teams actively. The effect of this is that the rest of the team has a leader who ends up reactively setting the agenda in an environment where they need to stand up and question someone whose judgement they ordinarily have to accept.

If a leader has the benefit of skillfully employing the kinds of questions and awareness that a good coach uses every session, then they will be quicker to self-identify themselves as being off-centre and have a well-travelled pathway to re-establish their equilibrium, which is not only a more enjoyable way live, it also supports the proper functioning of their team.

To find out the second powerful question that great leaders ask themselves drawn from the coaching world, you will need to check out Uri’s well-considered Thought leadership.